Kool-Aid Sippin’

“We can see ourselves as brick layers or cathedral builders,” Global Chairman John Velhmeyer, KPMG

In a recent Wall Street Journal article, we are posed with the question ‘Can a job just be a job anymore’? The answer is a resounding ‘NO!’ if corporations are looking to attract and connect with the latest full-time employment eligible generation. Corporations are trying to elicit some kind of meaning or sense of higher calling from the typical 9-5 assembly line “make me money” approach they’ve had for generations past. Instead of just being a tax guy/lady, it is acceptable to believe that they are “support[ing] advancements in medicine” because they are helping to take the tax return process off of the brain surgeon’s mind — Wait. What?!

It is nothing new that my friends and I are grateful to be gainfully employed and excited to see the diverse opportunities that the future has in store for us <<< I’m projecting. This is, however, my new response to people who ask me about my job. #NoMoreComplaining #StartDoingStopLosing >>> Digression. Apologies.

With so many potential young professionals in the start up world or taking on fellowships to do good in the world or flocking to places that “provide meaning” like Google in droves, many companies are desperately trying to figure out how on earth to keep us employed within their four walls. When corporate leaders use words like ‘higher calling’ and ‘change the world’ in the quarterly company memos or investor meetings even though their employees are on the assembly line and know they’re packaging crap to meet the bottom line, in my opinion it’s worse than putting the proverbial lipstick on a pig. If you want me to be a loyal and engaged employee, pay me appropriately and actually foster employee engagement. Don’t try to tell me I’m keg standing the Kool-Aid when it’s actually being water boarded. At the end of the day Kool-Aid will always be cheaper than providing a decent meal that would prod me to stick around a bit longer. Until companies truly get this, the employer hopping trend will only intensify.

Below is a list of companies with the shortest tenure in 2013. You may be a little surprised to see the golden goose of employers on this list… however, if you are surprised you’re a victim of sipping a little too much of the red juice.

You can see the full list here. Yes, my employer is listed. No, I am nowhere near the median pay.

At the end of the day, I wonder if my generation is a bit disillusioned. Should we really be looking to our employer to help us make the world a better place? Should we try to do this on our own, outside the designated 9-5 hours? After all, when you were in school didn’t you spend more time on your extracurriculars than school itself? No? Was that just me? Oh…

Song of the Day: Working for the Weekend – Loverboy

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